Living below your means

The mall lights dazzle, the crowds seem to surge endlessly, mall rats (today's teenagers) stand in line at the McDonalds, distance is measured from one store to the other, people arrange to meet at the Westside west entrance.  Cut to school drop in the morning - maids and drivers emerge from luxury vehicles to bring the young prince/princess to be educated, the 3 year old wears a Benneton t-shirt to play mud cakes, the moms who attend wear designer wear at 8:00 am, the afternoon pick up is high fashion time.

I am retro on this topic, ooh, this radical thought of living within reason and below your means.  My problem is that development in Bangalore seems to be equated directly to conspicuous consumption.  Birthday parties at the Leela for a 3 year old?  I mean, come on.  In our hurry to show off and keep up with whoever the heck we need to keep up with, for whatever the heck reason, the values children imbibe are 'ask and you shall receive'.  Behaviour and consequences?  Those are for the outdated middle-class people who can't afford that foreign trip.

How about living below one's means?  I mean, when one makes a lakh a month, my puny little imagination can not even comprehend how they can live beyond their means. When did 'middle class' stop being about some human, decent values and come to be known for being 'regressive'?!  Travel is great.  We did it and love it.  Exposure through travel and living in other lands is what opens minds up.  But this 'we only go on foreign trips' attitude is hardly healthy?!

My kids know nothing of my growing up days of 'twice a year good dresses shall be purchased.'  They also do not think that everytime we go out, something will be bought for them.  We actively discourage gifts at birthday parties and do book and clothes exchanges.  We gave on my daughter's birthday this year - requested gifts to be books to donate to the Hippocampus Reading Foundation, went to the HRF offices, where the person in charge gave them a cd and annual report, pointed out some children who might be reading the books we gave and said 'thank you'.

I am not asking for any kudos here.  We are quite okay with being looked at as ogre parents who do not allow their kids any gifts on their birthdays.  We get them stuff - they are well clothed, have nice cycles and games, have activities and friends and tons of books.  They also have our time and joint family activities and a school they love to go to.  Are they deprived?  Hell, no!

My point is that people who have seen money suddenly act like it will run out tomorrow and ensure that it runs out today by buying, charging like crazy.  The best things in life are free.  And can't be charged to Mastercard.  And are tougher to get than anything in a store.  Retail therapy within limits has its place.  But having a comfortable home (not 'house with marble floors', mind you) to come back to, the sleep that comes with no debt and the satisfaction of having children who are decent human beings is way, way better.

I feel sad for the 20-somethings who pooh-pooh their super conservative parents in the heady days of the first job, seeing pay packets in the first month that their parents did not at the peaks of their careers.  Okay, these parents could loosen up a bit.  But the real sense in their words is missed - form over content....that is the problem with this mindless aping and cell phone/car/job switching.

How about trying to empty out an ocean with a bucket and take responsibility for our children, teach them that everything comes at a cost and ensure that they are prepared to pay this cost, fair or not, as they live out their choices?!  And that living below your means is just good common sense, not some new 'get-rich' scheme (though it will get you rich in the long run!). I am a follower of the Louise Hay school of thought - the Universe shall give limitlessly, act like it will always be and come back down to earth with your lifestyle.

G'night!