The blame game.....

Am getting really annoyed with people passing the buck. Am trying hard to not do it myself, but lately some experiences have been really out of the ordinary.

The crowning experience of it all was my maid. She has not come to work for two months and 1 week and counting. She placed her sister with me as stop gap and it could have been a really bad experience otherwise. So we start off with typhoid just before my 2 week long vacation. Not a problem - my plants would be watered by sister. Come back and call from Delhi in concern and find she has had surgery. Some thing removed from the back of her neck....major surgery but required only a day in hospital. Concerned now, still like an idiot, no concern for self.

It is now a month, convalescence time has been amply used. People have seen her chatting and gallivanting away in town, still no sign of beginning work. Now daughter is in hospital for high fever, think it is 'piper' flu (belief is that 'panni' flu is in papers and therefore in our neighbourhood!). Then it is a month and a half and now school has started for the kids, am working my behind off and coming home to find it in the same state in which I left it. Not pretty.

Now, we can't walk....so tired that we are in bed all the time. "I am coming on the 1st" - guess what today is Monday and 1st is the next wednesday. "Houdha? Okay, I will try!" Now it is the 7th and I find out that she has been 'possessed' by a ghost/goddess for two months. Driver has been scared out of his wits by her baring her teeth at him, growling and making like she would bite! Slowly, the fraternity/sorority comes out with it...."she is possessed", "that amma will come and destroy us all", "we thought if we told you, you would get scared"....now, this is a humdinger. Never heard of a 2 month time off for being possessed. Reality is closer to 'work in order to possess'!

Now, what do I do? One part of me is pretty upset that a person like her with self esteem and the inability to accept charity ("I will not take unless you give me some extra work"), a single mother with three kids, who walked out on an abusive relationship, who was working hard to educate her kids and ensured they did their homework and went to tuition because she was not literate, is now at seeing this low point in life. Wonder what being possessed really is in medical terms - hallucinations? schizophrenia?

The other part is also upset to see my own state. Pay very generously, take care of them as much as I can, in return expect really basic service and put up with less than that, deal with absences without notice again and again (despite clear instructions, a cell phone being available and the offer to reimburse for calls made) without blowing my top - this is more than my husband gets....

We all want to help and be good employers. We also have to expect of help value for money. It is almost irresponsible to not expect this (my fault!) because then we build in them the understanding for professional behaviour, much like is expected of us. If I were to be out of touch with my employer for a week (maybe three days in todays' times), my job would have been so far gone, it would be funny!

I finally fired her. Cut my heartstrings and decided that charity begins at home, in this case with myself. Two kids in two different schools, a job (that allows me flexibility, thank god!), car pools and kids' extracurriculars, a couple of additional NGO responsibilities.....I need help too. Now I have someone coming in at 5:45 am and sweeping my floors. She does half of what the other person did for almost the same money. The time slot is a crucial thing for working people and this person is supposed to be reliable. Hence the premium....market economics at its best.

The old maid's sister was to take up another chunk of the work - she has the keys, is reliable.....except she now has typhoid. And I wonder how much of that cycle will repeat itself. Two possessions in the same household, both of whom worked for me.....that ghost must be mine!

G'night!